Today I awoke at 9:30 after only sleeping a total of 3 hours. I woke up hurting more than I had in over a week. My nausea literally had me doubled over in pain. I proceeded through my normal routine; medicine, coffee (I don't care if I am dying or not...they will never take away my coffee), taking my dog out, fresh glass of juice and a water, and then I had to lay back down again. Kevin got the kids donuts (they love donuts on Sundays). Kaitlyn and Tristan washed the breakfast dishes and put them away and they swept the kitchen floor. Damion's job in the mornings is to disinfect the counters (literally everything has to be disinfected due to my crap immune system) but, he was up all night looking for a job so Kevin did Damion's chore for him. I know I should really eat breakfast, especially with my Prednisone, but I simply cannot tolerate food in the mornings. I just end up throwing it up...so coffee will have to do. My doctor told me to look into Ensure (but honestly, I cannot stand the taste). I literally could not get out of the bed at all today. My fever spiked to 104 before the Tylenol actually started working (which was just a few minutes ago because I am sweating my behind off now).
Kaitlyn and Tristan wanted to spend time with me, so they sat in my bedroom and played the PS3 for the majority part of the morning while I sat up in bed and watched them. Between games, they both came over to me and gave me tons of kisses on the cheek. I heard I love you more times than I can count today. Kevin made sure the dog was fed and watered, figured out our budget, and made sure I was comfortable all day. And of course, there were lots of kisses and I love you's on his part too. Damion woke up at around 1:30, and even though he is seventeen, he spent the entire day in my room with me. These are the moments I have come to cherish.
I took a nice leisurely shower. The warm water felt so good on my joints and helped with the nausea some. I had just enough energy to blow-dry my hair and put on my leisure clothes (I own more pairs of pajamas than I do actual clothes). After I got dressed, Kevin looked at me lovingly and said 'you are the most beautiful woman in the world. I am such a lucky man'. Of course, he always says that, leaving me to question if he really has 20/20 vision (he is in his forties so I could be on to something).
Mom called me several times to check on me today (actually, I speak to my mom about 10 times a day every day...moments I will always cherish). She told me that my aunt called her and wanted her to tell me that she loved me and I am in her daily prayers. Knowing that my family loves me so much helps me get through my really rough days. My mom is not a person who shows worry or fear outwardly and that is actually something very calming for me. She has always been a woman of great strength and courage. I am the opposite. I worry on a constant basis and though I fear only four things, I cannot contain my feelings. My mom was in the delivery room with me when I delivered all three of my babies via c-section. It was because of her that I was able to remain calm during my deliveries. So, talking to my mom on a daily basis is a moment I live in...and a moment I will hold dear to me forever.
Kevin made a delicious dinner for us tonight; grilled chicken and rice with green beans. He served mine to me in bed. I am very blessed. I have not thrown up my dinner yet so that is definitely a moment I am blessed with. After dinner, Damion did the dishes and disinfected the counters, Kaitlyn dried the dishes and put them away, and Tristan swept the floors and cleaned off the kitchen table. Then the kids went into their rooms and played for the remainder of the evening. I could hear my sweet daughter singing on her Karaoke Machine and it brought a huge smile to my face. Tristan was playing on his Steam on the computer, and every time he wins a game or is made a host of a game, he runs into the room to boast about his excitement. Damion stayed in my room until about 9:30 playing the PS3.....even when he isn't actually talking to me, I really soak in the moments he is near me. It won't be long until my oldest leaves the nest and that makes me incredibly sad (we will save that for another blog).
I have taken my plethora of night-time medicine and will hopefully be able to sleep without waking up to throw up every hour. Before I go to bed tonight, I will say my prayers and thank God for all of the wonderful parts of the day. I will thank God for Kevin who can still see me underneath all of my symptoms and suffering and have faith that I will one day be myself again. As I drift off to sleep, I will feel the corners of my mouth turn up in a smile; today I was happy.
No comments:
Post a Comment